Sunday, February 14, 2016

Let No Man Put Asunder?! Part 3

IV. SYNTHESIS AND APPLICATION
            From the foregoing Bible passages, we can see the continuous emphasis on the unity, indissolubility, and inviolability of marriage.  Marriage is intended by God as a permanent union between a man and a woman.  It is the divine will and plan that spouses should go through their marriage life through thick and thin.  However, due to human sinfulness, extreme cases of sexual immorality and desertion by the unbelieving spouse serve as grounds for a divorce.  With these, we should be reminded that the Bible does not mandate divorce as the immediate course of action to be taken by the spouses.  Rather, reconciliation and forgiveness should be sought for by both parties.
            Divorce and Remarriage are issues that affect the whole society. Its misapplication can bring about deleterious effects to every marriage and family relations. In fact, there is a rising percentage of unreported de facto separation between spouses in the Philippines.  Due to the tedious process of annulment and/or declaration of nullity of marriage, spouses opt to separate themselves from each other, and remarry.
            The following are my proposals as we deal with this sensitive issue:
  1. Maintain a high view of Marriage.  It must be emphasized that marriage as designed by God is to be a permanent union between a man and a woman.  Pastors should preach on the topic of marriage so that church members will be aware of what God’s will is for their marriage.  Moreover, young people should also be taught about what the Bible teaches about marriage.  At a very early age, young people should be taught about commitment.  They must learn that marriage is the goal of every dating and courtship.  They should not enter into a “love relationship” with the opposite sex when they are not prepared to meet the expectations of being a good and godly partner. In the Philippines, young people spend much of their time in social media and entertainment, thus, their concept of love and marriage is molded by the media.  Hence, parents have the primary obligation to teach commitment to their children. 
  2. Emphasize the importance of pre-marital and marital counseling.  Pre-marital counseling serves as a guide to set the proper expectations and priorities for marriage.  Spouses tend to bring into their marriages their respective unrealistic expectations.  When these unrealistic expectations are not met, communication breaks down, and so is the marriage.  Moreover, counseling has been taken for granted by many because they are in the state of self-denial. They think that it is always the other party who is at fault, when in truth and in fact, they have also contributed into the disintegration of the marital relationship.  In counseling, parties can be confronted with their issues, and are guided to resolve their issues with each other.
  3. Church Discipline.  The bible is clear that every Christian is to bear one another’s burden.  We are called to be accountable to each other and to the church.  At the same time, church leaders are given the responsibility to protect and care for their members.  One way of caring for the married couples in the church is through constant communication and/or visitation.  Through this means, the church leaders can be informed as to the statuses of the marriage of their church members and offer counseling and prayers to those who are struggling.  In the event of unrepentance, though the erring party has already been confronted by many people and for several instances, then the church as a whole should discipline such unrepentant member in a loving and caring manner.  Further, the church should not be judgmental to people who are divorced or annulled. Rather, the church should be a place for healing and care for these people.

With these, we should be reminded that Divorce goes against the will of God for marriage, and that remarriage is only a concession given to the innocent party only in extreme cases of sexual immorality and intentional abandonment.

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